Tuesday, November 17, 2009

London, Dating, Camgirls, and Utter Stupidity

So, there's been a shocking revelation via the letters page in the Metro this morning. Some girl can't find a boyfriend in London and therefore every boy in London doesn't actually want a girlfriend and is automatically after one thing. And, let's face it, so am I. I want it now - it's the best feeling when you know it's coming, and whoever you get it from, it's all the same really. That's right: money. I don't have any and therefore I'd like some. Damn you, whoever invented money (Romans? Or beforehand? I don't really know, or care). But anyway, back to the post.

I'm assuming that this girl is referring to sex, which is the thing that automatically all the boys in London are after. Why, yes, of course they are, my dear. Because girls don't really like sex, do they? Boys get erections and chase skirt, and girls end up forced into an act they absolutely hate.

With an attitude like that you're not likely to get any sex yourself, never mind the boyfriend you claim to be looking for.

Having said that, it is - of course - painfully obvious that this girl is deluded. She just happens to have met some wankers. But girls in London (those you can meet over the internet, anyway) sometimes don't do themselves any favours. The majority of girls on sex dating websites and listing services are camgirls, who will attempt to scam you out of some money (but won't get any of mine... because I'm too smart, and don't have any anyway!) by promising you sex, and may not even be girls in the first place. It's likely to put you off any sort of Internet dating, not that match.com or Guardian Soulmates or... any of the others... seem to work that well either.

And what if you are a real girl looking for love, or even simple honest-to-god sex? You're going to be extremely difficult to find among the sea of camgirls. Sex bloggers are a lot more reliable. I met my lovely girlfriend through writing a sex blog and she's not even from London.

Anyway, this girl who took it upon herself to text Metro deriding all the males in London is wrong. I'm willing to bet any amount of money (don't take me up on that, you'll be sorely disappointed) that truckloads of lovely boys have texted in to correct her by pointing out that they, in fact, are looking for girlfriends, rather than That One Thing. From my experience, anyway, boys are more inclined towards romantic endeavours than girls are. Or is that just cynicism?

Oh, also, you can have sex with your girlfriend if you want. Did anyone point that bit out...?

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