Casualty

Sometimes, you can have a lot of pleasure without eventually having an orgasm. My orgasms are brief - they're incredibly pleasurable, but they last for a few seconds before subsiding. More often than not, I aftershock for a while, and then feel ready to go again. Seconds out, round two... that sort of thing. I used to have a lot of dry orgasms. I still do, occasionally, although it's less often - I'm more of a "fill her up" ILB at the moment.

But anyway, pleasure sans orgasm. It happens. Even when you're trying your hardest, sometimes it doesn't come. And you don't come, either. And it happens to everyone. Fortunately, not particularly often.

This happened the other day, but not to me. I was in one of my special positions (kneeling, between the thighs), determined to reach my goal. I had an index finger inside my girlfriend's vagina, feeling the inside walls contract around its shape and her labia dilating, letting me in. Nice. I had a little finger (on the same hand) stroking her perineum and probing towards the anus (although not entering it). And to top all that off, my tongue was drawing little circles around her clit, which - judging by the fact that it was nice and hard - was clearly the right thing to do. And there were the moans, and the jerks, and the grasping of hands.

The only problem was, she didn't orgasm.

And stupid ILB kept going. I do this. I mean, I don't think it's fair if she doesn't come once I've started. We had a very highly sexed weekend, mostly - on the bed in the evening, twice on the bed in the morning, then on the bathroom floor later on. You know, that thing that couples do when they've had a lot of sugar. But we were still up for more by the time Saturday evening rolled around. And so I thought I'd make her orgasm first and THAT'S WHAT I WAS GOING TO DO, DAMN IT. So I kept going.

And going.

Eventually she shifted, and I surfaced. I wanted to tell her that I'd do something different, we could have penetrative sex, or I'd feel her, or I could just reposition myself. I wanted her orgasm and it wasn't presenting itself. I wasn't ready to orgasm myself, either. Maybe we were a bit oversexed. I had a reasonable explanation for all this; unfortunately, I wasn't in any condition to say much.

"Blaaaaaaaargh," I managed to say, which wasn't really much of an explanation or apology. I collapsed onto my front and only then did I realise what I'd done to my own body. My back was on fire with hot prickles, I had cramp in both my legs and my knees were stiff and sore. My neck was twisted a little, my hair was all messed up and my nose, which had been pressed against her lady garden the whole time, was hurting a lot more than it should. And my tongue was raw. The fingers I had used had seized up completely; and every time I tried to move them, they hurt. My eyes watered and I could hardly move, never mind talk, and worst of all, I hadn't made her come.

She held me while I lay there and felt so terribly inadequate. I mean, I felt infirm too, but that would pass. (It took a while, but it did pass. I was probably asleep, though.) She even fetched me some water, which - as I was supposed to be doing stuff for her - was wonderful of her. And she told me not to keep licking her for such long periods of time if I ended up hurting that much.

But I wouldn't have cared if I'd made her come.

I didn't sleep too well that night.